Yo Mama Jokes

MiaMeade

"My dad sold me to a pack of werewolves to settle his gambling debt." ❀ "I'm going to count to three," Logan growls. He doesn't have to say the rest. If I haven't come to him by then, he'll come to me... and I'll regret it. I know this game, and I know there is only one way it can end: with broken bones. If I don't come to him, his wolf will take over and he'll make me pay. If I obey, his wolf will still take over, and I'll still be the one suffering the consequences. "One," Logan snaps. A tear slowly rolls down my cheek and I dig my nails into my palm until they draw blood. More tears join the first and my lower lip trembles. I want Logan to see how much he's hurting me. "Two," Logan counts, gesturing for me to come to him. I know that he's filled with anticipation. He's hoping for 'three,' craving it. ❀ Three Books in One: Sold to a Wolf Pack | ✔ Saved by a Wolf Pack | ✔ Loved by a Wolf Pack | Ongoing ❀ A fake Omega: Saffron is a rogue, but when her dad sells her to a pack of werewolves, she also has to pretend to be an Omega. Good thing she has a plan: to escape the first chance she gets. A not so mean Alpha: Logan just wants to find his mate and his happily ever after, but instead of the perfect Luna, he gets a weak, frightened Omega. Good thing his dad has a plan: make everyone in the pack mistreat Saffron so she'll finally stand up for herself. An epic romance: Saffron and Logan are meant to be, but will they realize it before it's too late? Not everything is as it seems, and with an enemy threatening to destroy the pack, time is running out. ❀ 167,102 words ❀ Has been ranked #1 in: Werewolf, Paranormal, Romance, Teen Fiction, Humor, Fantasy, General Fiction, Action and even Vampire!

_SaskiaThomas

Madison porter was in a relationship with a mobster but things went left when she found him in bed with a random blond . Devastated. She moved far away . Until they ran into each other in a new city ... will she forgive him?

itss1ivv

"It really is a shame that such a pretty face is about to get so fucked up." I say as I run my finger down his jawline. "Even more so that it was wasted on an asshole like you." I add. "Feel free to sit on it anytime you want, Tesoro." He replies. *** Anastasia Levkin has recently taken the title of Donna of the Russian mafia after her father died. No one knows she exists, let alone is the most feared and deadliest assassin in the world and the new queen of the Russians. When Anastasia goes on a mission to infiltrate the Italian mafia, she believes it will be an easy task - get caught, lie her way into the Italian mafia and destroy them. Simple right? Except things don't always go according to plan. When Vincenzo Medici, the Don of the Italian mafia, catches Anastasia in his warehouse, he falls into her trap and accepts her into his mafia. Using her as an asset... but is that really all she is to him? The question stands: Will blood always run thicker than water? Or are there exceptions? The more time she spends with Vincenzo and his family, the more difficult her decision becomes. *** *Book 1 of the Medici series* BEING RE-WRITTEN #1 in Mafia on 21/03/22 #1 in Humour on 22/03/22 #1 in Gun on 22/03/22 #4 in Romance on 21/03/22 #1 in MafiaRomance on 08/04/22 #1 in Don on 17/04/22 #7 in Funny on 15/11/22 #2 in Plottwist on 05/03/22 #1 in Assassin on 22/02/23

sugarfairy1976

'If you're done staring then please sit down' - Christian Valentino © sugarfairy1976 Best rankings! #1 sarcastic #1 sm #1 cute romance #1 Chloe #2 boss #4 millionaire #5 Christian #5 possessive #6 billionaire #8 humour #22 romance Under construction

cham3leon

Three things. A boy who loves to piss her off. A girl who loves to annoy him. And them understanding what it's like to feel love, while being scared of it at the same time [I flick his forehead with my pointer finger, "You're an ass," He leans down further near my ear so only I can hear him. "Y'know you're kinda cute when you're pissed."]

kenziexwrites

I prop my elbows on top of the kitchen counter, leaning forward as I continue sucking on my cherry red lollipop. Glancing up, I stare directly into his eyes as I unhook my lips from the treat making a pop sound that echoed throughout the kitchen. He stares intensely at me as my tongue ran across the tip of the lollipop. I hear him groan roughly, desperate which causes me to wickedly smirk. The color in his eyes suddenly drains and he rounds the counter, stopping directly in front of me. "You're playing with fire," He mumbles dangerously low, looking down at me. His drained-colored eyes watch my mouth in awe as my tongue rounds the entire treat seductively. He narrows his eyes at me. "Then burn me," I whisper, taunting him, challenging him as I now stood chest to chest with him. In a fast motion, Aiden snatches the lollipop from my mouth, dropping it onto the ground before gripping my chin and forcing my head up. "Fire makes smoke, baby. You know that right?" My cool lips kiss his thumb which makes him tug my red lip. Staring directly into his eyes, I pull out another lollipop from my pocket, unraveling the wrapper. "The question is, can fire handle all of this smoke?" I whisper, bringing myself to his height to lightly brush my lips against his which makes him groan again. I suck on my new lollipop and turn around walking away smoothly, his gaze lingering on me until I was out of sight. I smile, knowing he was coming to find out for himself. ** UPDATES BACK ON ** © 2019 kenziexwrites. all rights reserved. november 25th, 2019